"That's one...small step for man...one..giant bill for mankind!"

You caught me, I was paraphrasing.



I wonder though, what the harm could be in trying to privatize the space program?
Stay with me for a minute, leaving the rhetoric behind.

We went to the moon, making it a priority of the government and NASA.  In the process we spent over 25 billion in 1960's dollars, estimated by the Congressional Budget Office in 2004/2005 for inflation to equate to 170 billion 2005 dollars.  With what was a proposed 15 year span, the goal of which was to return Americans to the Moon by 2020, in 2006 the Government Accountability Office released a report citing an inflated cost of at least $230 billion dollars for the Constellation program (which incidentally is already over-budget and behind schedule. Fear not though, apparently even the private companies are behind schedule.)

A revised report in 2009 notes that due to technical and design issues the true cost of the program cannot be presently calculated.  In their infinite wisdom (and spend now mindset) Congress has extended NASA a lifeline.  Wait, so tell me again how the other 350 million of us, just counting Americans mind you, not the other 5.5 billion people on the planet, are benefitting from 6 people bobbing around in space?  Or living on the moon?  Please don't answer with technological innovations.  Velcro?  Not good enough, besides Velcro was not designed in space, it was made for the space program not by it.  Last I looked, my pants, coat, and most of my wife's dresses still rely on Zippers, a device first patented in the 1850's and made serviceable/popular for clothing in the 1930's.  (Would that they had Velcro, I imagine there would be a lot more rambunctiousness in our house.  Wink wink, nudge nudge, know what I mean?  Say no more, say no more.  Think NBA players and their warm up pants just going into the game from the scorer's table.  SCRRRITTCH!!  - and off.  Really?  That was 170 billion well spent.  Lebron James thanks you NASA.)

Dehydrated meals?  Every backpacker out there I'm sure is happy we know how to freeze dry / dehydrate more than just peas (though it seems like peas have made it into every dehydrated meal I have ever had.  Why is that?)  Silicon computer chips?  Hydrogen fuel cells?  One out of two made successful, and by who?  Private companies.  Still waiting on fuel cell technology.  It was only invented 40 years ago.  In that span of time we have gone from computers filling up a whole room to fitting in the palm of your hand. 

So wait, we are using government funding to fuel innovation which will then be used by private enterprise to make a buck off of us, having paid for the research ahead of time with our taxpayer dollars?  Personally, I am confused as to why we have to reinvent the wheel in the first place.  Didn't we do this over 40 years ago?  Haven't we already paid for this ride once?  So we're paying for it twice (three times really) and relieving the private sector of doing their own R&D?  Is that it?  I thought we were against that.  I thought that competition drove innovation, not government spending.  I thought privatization meant lower costs and more efficiency, because as we all know the government can't build or do something without the cost escalating by a factor of 4.  Isn't that how we all think, especially when you hear that something is a "government" operation?  Apparently I'm wrong, but if that's the way we all think about other government endevours (see HealthCare) why are people crying for the continued funding of an already overschedule and overbudget NASA program?  One reason is it could mean the loss of several thousand key jobs in the Aerospace industry, especially for the constituents of a certain Republican Senator from Alabama.  That would be bad.

Not that I'm against jobs or space travel mind you.  Quite a few public figures I know could benefit from living on the Moon, or Mars, really anywhere but here on Earth; Lindsey Lohan, Brittany Spears, Newt Gingritch, Donald Trump, the cast of "Glee" (and the writers for Glee, the producers, directors, costume designers, key grip, gopher, anybody who watches Glee really.  Sorry guys, you get your own colony in space.  Third asteroid from the right, two parsecs down the aisle.)  (*Yes I stole an idea from Douglas Adams, and the rest of us will die a horrible death from an infectious disease picked up from an unsanitized telephone. If you don't get it, read "The Restaurant at the End of the Universe.")

So really, NASA doesn't have a budget problem, they have a public relations problem.  If they would only market what the true benefits would be, I believe people would not only be happy to renew their federal budget, they would be lining up to give extra.  I know I would. 

"Ah yes Mr. McConaughey, we have a window seat reserved for you in first class, aisle 4, right next to Roseanne and Mr. Affleck.  Our flight attendant will now cover some basic safety instructions.  In the event the cabin should decompress, please do not panic.  That is perfectly normal.  You may experience some momentary discomfort but this will pass quickly as your blood boils, you don't need to worry about whether or not you can work the emergency release lever, all cabin hatches open and close themselves automatically after you have been shot into space.  Your seat is not equipped with a flotation device and there is no oxygen mask, so please don't bother looking for them. Again, thank you for flying with us."